Five Things Friday

Wow, Friday is here again.  Here are my five things this week that really get under my skin:

#5- 500 people standing in line at Wal-mart and only 2 checkers are open.  Really?  Does Wal-Mart really have to worry about making ends meet to the point that they can’t open a few more lines?  This item would have once been #1 on my things that irritate me but now that I have decided to read while I wait, I don’t mind so much.  Do I carry a book with me?  NO!  I simply read any and all magazines I want to while waiting in line.  I figure that if they don’t want me reading magazines and not buying them then they will open more checkers.  So, now I pick the line that has the best selection of magazines, forget which line is longer- the longer the better means more time to read.

#4- Ants– I HATE ants.  We have been battling them all summer.  They build under every rock edge I have around my gardens.  They bite me every time I weed the gardens.  Trying to control them organically meant putting out dried molasses- which usually works great.  However, the ants seemed to thrive.  I had a chat with my Extension Agent and come to find out I have Pharaoh Ants, also known as sugar ants.  I was feeding the bloody devils!

#3- Smart Farm Animals– Smart farm animals are the most irritating things you can encounter on this earth.  The reason being is they can figure out any gate latch, constantly check all fences for any holes, wait for the moment when a barn door has been left open and never give you a moments peace.   And when they do get out, they will ALWAYS remember where the feed is stored and where your favorite rose bush is planted.  However, the dumb animals- they stay in their pens, eat the feed that you bring them and generally have no plans to take over the world.

#2  The Burn Pile-  Now its not really the burn pile that irritates me, when you live in the country this is just a fact of life.  Trees fall, storms blow limbs down so you usually have a pile.  What bothers me ( I would say “what aggravates the piss out of me” but my mother doesn’t like it when I say that and my city friends get the weirdest looks on their faces when I do, so I will refrain) is when a young person is told to put something in the burn pile and what I get is what is pictured to the left.  What Part of “IN the burn pile did you not understand?”  These boxes are clearly not in the pile.  I would blame his teachers, but he is home schooled.burn pile

#1- When I hear someone say, “Young people don’t…” you can fill in the blank but usually I hear it in regards to young people understanding what it means to work hard, how the country should run or about being appreciative.  Well, if the young people don’t it is because the old people didn’t.  The younger generation only possess what the previous generation gave them.  If the children have not been taught then it is our fault.  I love my young people, they are responsible, kind, courteous and brave.  I put in a lot of work to see that fruit. So, if you don’t like what you see then get involved and build some relationships with young people.  Our future is in their hands, we should invest in them.

la mancha dairy goatNow if you will excuse me, I am sure there is some smart farm animal misbehaving.  Don’t let Salsa’s innocent expression fool you, anarchy lurks behind those eyes!

Five Things Friday

I have seen several of these “five things Friday” posts and they are usually along the lines of things that inspire you or photographs.  Well, my five things are of a different vain.  I have decided to do Five Things That Chap My Hide.  So here we go, we will be counting them down from least aggravating to most aggravating, the same kind of order that David Letterman uses.

#5- Pony tail holders and bobby pins– these irritate me because they can never be found.  A whole package can disappear with in 48 hours leaving all 4 females looking for them desperately while the 2 males help look just to shut us up but really can’t understand why we can’t keep up with these items.  The next time my mother says, “Well, it didn’t sprout legs and run off.” I will submit exhibit A- ponytail holders and bobby pins as evidence that things do sprout legs and run off.  Exhibit B would be the empty black cups and pots that I use for the herbs- they run all over my yard on their own.

#4-Self-filling laundry hampers– I don’t know how we keep managing to purchase these defective hampers, but we do.  Every time I get one emptied I walk in an hour later and it is half full.  I like a glass half full but not a laundry hamper.

#3- Walmart– you knew at least one item would have to do with Wal-mart.  Actually, I could have done a whole list every Friday for a year on this subject, but today we will keep it to just one thing.  There is this huge warehouse behind Wal-Mart and never, I mean NEVER, is there anything stored back there.  If the shelf is empty or just has 2 items and you need 3 of the thing- don’t even ask because I can tell you that they do NOT have anymore in the back.

#2- Flu-shot advertisements– these things should be outlawed.  How these companies can claim that you are protected from the flu guaranteed I do not know.  The truth is there are numerous strains of the flu and one strain can mutate into another strain as the season progresses.  The idea that the one or two strains that you get vaccinated for will be the only ones you are exposed to is ridiculous.  The odds are better at the Black Jack table in Vegas.  If you really want to protect yourself, eat more herbs and use herbal supplements to boost your immune system.

#1- Stupid Questions– Whoever said, “There is no such thing as a stupid question” never had children.  Example: My daughter walks into my room and says, “I spilled milk in the kitchen, do you want me to clean it up?” My response, “No, we have fairies that fly around the house every night and clean.”

Now that I am done fussing, I will go chill like our farm cat- Cheezit
Now that I am done fussing, I will go chill like our farm cat- Cheezit